By now everyone knows the New England Patriots will be without Tom Brady for the first 4 games of the 2016 NFL Season.  It’s never easy replacing a starter let alone a future Hall of Famer/G.O.A.T. who drives and controls every aspect of the offense.  While there is talent abound thriving inside the arm of Jimmy Garrapolo, the fact is he may just not be ready to handle the rigors of a NFL season.  The Pats need insurance in more ways than one and need to cultivate a starter until Tommy comes back.


Top 5 QB’s That Can Adequately Replace Tom Brady


5) Matt Flynn


Flynn is like the swiss army knife of the NFL.  He can do a lot of things alright, he can exist, and generally there’s always a tool better than him for the job.  But check this out.  Guess who holds the Packers single game record for passing yards and touchdowns…not Brett Favre, not Aaron Rodgers.  Nope its MFing Matt Flynn.  Judging from how much the Patriots like to throw the ball that could be a super match.  Plus he already has experience filling in for a #12.  That kind of leadership does not grow on trees.

4) Jake Delhomme


I know I know.  Way too low on the list.  Honestly I would have had him #1 but age needs to be factored into this decision.  Although he may be older…he is also infinitely wiser.  It’s not like NFL announcers throw the term “gunslinger” around for just anybody.  Sure Brett Favre was THE Gunslinger but this is THE CAJUN Gunslinger we’re talking about.  He’s already familiar with the Pats terminology after being coached by Mangini in Cleveland.  Is Robert Kraft waiting for the daylight to come or what?  SIGN THIS GUY

3) Michael Vick


Best QB to ever play(with in Madden04) the game hands down.  Vick knows how to handle controversy and would be full of sage wisdom the Pats locker room desperately needs.  Here’s a guy with tons of experience against the AFC East and a pair of feet that would make Steve Prefontaine weep.  Remember when TB12 juked out Urlacher to nab first down?  Imagine seeing the Pats QB doing that at least 2 or 3 times more per game.  That would be an experience!

2) Brett Favre


Of all the QB’s out there here is the #1 guy that would never miss a 50 year shitstorm.  Doesn’t mean he is the best candidate to replace Tom but you can bet he has just been sitting in his tractor waiting for something like this to happen.  Only has to play 1/4 of the season, still gets a ring, still gets shiploads of money.  It’s all gravy for the OG Gunslinger.  It would also effectively cut off all negative coverage of Deflategate from ESPN etc.  The only things greater than scandal are Tim Tebow and Brett Favre playing the game like a little kid.  Tebow is taken but Favre is wrapped in copper and SO ready to have you talk about him 24/7.  Do the right thing Belicheck.

1) Giovanni Carmazzi







As I stated at the beginning it’s never easy replacing the GOAT…unless you have a goat farmer in your back pocket.  This guy has been waiting his whole career/life for this moment.  Already knows how to play in harsh weather after setting college records at Hofstra and leading the Rhein Fire to a 5-5 record.  Want to know why he doesn’t own a TV?  Because mastering the west coast offense is a full time job.  In his case a job that lasts over a decade.  You thought Tom learned about the benefits of yoga from Gisele? Get real.  Gio has helped shape Brady’s career since Day 1 and now it’s time for him to fulfill his destiny.  Time to leave the mountains Gio; your best friend needs you.