Wait…they voted for WHAT?!?!

File this one under, “Really? You really want the Rams?! AND THE RAIDERS?!”

The City Council of Inglewood, California just voted 5-0 to impose a $2 billion tax bill on its residents. And everyone cheered. Some guys even showed up dressed in their Ram’s yellow and blue. The obnoxious kind of the Ram’s yellow and blue. Like, really yellow and blue; greatest show on turf yellow and blue.

Dear Inglewood, You done stepped in it. You’re not going to get that $H!T out of the herringbone treads of your Adidas Superstars. Trust me. That last one is from personal experience. I miss those shelltoes. But not as much as the residents of Inglewood, California are going to miss their money.

It’s like what Dr. Dre rapped in the next episode, “Clip in the strap, dippin’ through hoods (what hoods?)…Compton, Long Beach, Inglewood!” via the Next Episode. Now, stick that in your queue and bump it.

The newest site of the next biggest $2 billion taxpayer headache in Inglewood, California.
The newest site of the next biggest $2 billion taxpayer headache coming soon to Inglewood, California.

I’ve come up with a few possible explanations for this terrible occurrence.

The multitude of hours of presentations suffered through equates to torture according to the United Nations.

They misunderstood the vote, I think they were delirious and begging for the whole thing to stop.

They thought they were getting the Oakland Bong-Rippers and the St. Louis Turn Down the Whats?! Two very promising semi-pro rec-league teams in the American Flip-Cup League. (Not really, but it sounded good.)

Congratulations, Inglewood. You just got yourself your very own JERRY-WORLD. Seriously, the locals in Arlington, Texas really call it Jerry-World; its like a cathartic sigh when it escapes their lips…and their wallets via their tax bills.

The AT&T Stadium monstrosity cost the taxpayers of Arlington, Texas only $1.2 billion. Inglewood, you about to get hosed, just like Arlington.

Hundreds of acres were gobbled up by Jerry’s pre-plastic surgery ego and reconfigured into a Disneyland-like experience for fat-football-schulbs to shamble toward like the undead to see “them Cowboys!”

At one point in time, I lived in North Texas. They are truly a unique breed. Or should I say, unique “in-breed.” (I typed that last jab with love and from the heart, so I get a pass on that one.)

So yeah, Inglewood. Not only did you just drop some serious coin – that you have yet to actually pay – on a new stadium, you’re trying to lure two NFL teams to your nether-regions. Slow clap.

Inglewood, this guy may likely be in your future.
Inglewood, this guy may likely be in your future. He’s an CPA and drives a minivan…TO EVERY RAIDERS GAME.

And then there is … this guy….

I got nothing...
I got nothing…

It’s like what TuPac rapped, “Hey, you know LA is up in this…Pasadena, where you at…Yeah, Inglewood, Inglewood always up to no good,” in California Love.

Congratulations, Inglewood, instead of facing the 12.7% unemployment rate in your city or the homeless problem you just rolled over and let Roger Goodell snuggle right up behind you. Note, He’s the BIG SPOON.

Till next time, trust your gut and follow me @deepdfspicks