KMarko HR

Welcome back to the DraftKings segment where we try to get filthy rich playing daily fantasy sports. Where I’ll drop off my brainstorming for the night and try and pick out some guys I think are going to put up some good numbers. Started this journey a few months ago and it’s been a wild ride so far…winning $500 one night, getting cocky and playing $100 buy-in tourneys and promptly losing it the next.

Last night was a mixed bag…

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Hopefully everyone was on Machado, as he promptly went deep with 2 massive bombs. But we got burned on Arrietta who just didn’t bring his best stuff against the Indians, and Trout underwhelmed which sucks for that salary. Miggy did OK despite them pitching around him all night, and Kang didn’t do shit but that’s the risk you take with a cheapo value play.

Tonight’s a new night, and it’s a tough one, with tons of aces on the mound. We all know who to stay away from after last week’s fiasco…right? Wait…but maybe? Just maybe? Could it be…?

P Felix Hernandez $10.3K

No! No he didn’t! Yes he did!! What’s up motherfuckers! Picking Felix after it blew up in my face with a 0.1 inning, 8 earned run, -17 point outing last time I recommended him?? What kind of crazy asshole would do that? Does the guy just live to get death threats on Twitter???

Well here’s the deal – he’s still King Felix, he’s still got massive upside, and he’s pitching in a game with a 5.5 total against a team with a team total of 2.49. Never seen a team total that low. And, like I said, nobody in their right mind would pick him, so you’re looking at a low owned ace and Cy Young winner. So hey…let’s get a little crazy, what do you say?

And frankly I can’t pay $12.9K for Kershaw. But if you can, do it. He will dominate tonight.

1B Paul Goldschmidt $5.8K

Everyone’s going to be on the Rockies/Astros game, and rightfully so (11 total? Jesus). So I’m going to sneak in the back door with some exposure to the DBacks and Angels. High total on this one and a run explosion is expected, plus it’s in the DBacks park which is great for hitters. Goldy is the most expensive hitter on the board so you’re banking a lot on him paying off, and definitely can’t fit him if you’re paying up for pitching. But I think he’s worth it tonight.

3B Josh Donaldson $4.7K

Donaldson Alert! Donaldson Alert! Yup I am putting my streak on the line tonight and hoping to keep it going – 4 Donaldson picks on these blogs, 4 nights of Donaldson hitting a home run.

I’m sooo much better at predicting the exact nights Josh Donaldson is going to hit a home run than I am picking pitchers.

2B Luis Valbuena $4.0K

Like I said, the Rockies/Astros game is where it’s at tonight. Vegas expecting it to be a Run Fiesta (shout out to all my adult video guys who immediately thought of the reference there). Springer is the guy you want, but if I’m paying up for Goldschmidt no
way I can fit him, so I’m dipping down to a guy who just hit 2 bombs yesterday. The guy has as many home runs as singles, true story. And I’m not looking for singles.

Good luck out there tonight, don’t forget to check the weather. Tropical Storm Bill is a something else.