What sorcery is this? As I watched the match unfold I could hardly believe my eyes. Everton was beating Manchester United by 3 goals. Yes, that means Tim Howard got the clean sheet and to the victor go the spoils.

This is unusual, because Everton was on the ropes just a month or two ago where I wrote about the horrible season Howard was having. Perhaps he read it, got mad and decided to take out his frustrations on the EPL. Whatever happened, it’s working. Now, Everton has 5 wins in their last 6 matches with a draw against Swansea City. It warms the cockles of my heart to see Tim Howard dominate on the pitch.

Last Sunday’s match against Manchester United, Everton essentially put on a clinic on how to stop a team from being anything close to resembling effective.

Jul 1, 2014; Salvador, BRAZIL; United States goalkeeper Tim Howard (1) defends the goal in the second half against Belgium during the round of sixteen match in the 2014 World Cup at Arena Fonte Nova. Belgium defeated USA 2-1 in overtime. Mandatory Credit: Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports
Everton Goalie TIm Howard (center) was in World Cup form last weekend when the Toffeemen of Everton faced off against Manchester United and decidedly won the match 3-0.

Not only defensively, with Tim “Fear the Beard” Howard holding off 7 shots on goal and receiving a clean sheet, but also offensively. Everton’s offensive presence simply overwhelmed Manchester United’s defense. By the time the second goal came around in the 35th minute, even I was wondering if there was a mercy rule in the EPL.

Everton has got some strange nicknames, such as: The Dogs of War, The Blues, The Toffeemen, etc. Personally, I want to believe my club could rule the world if my club was called the Dogs of Friggin War.

It is obvious the Everton Football Club has built a rich history since being formed in 1878. Their club motto “Nil Satis Nisi Optimum” which means “nothing but the best is good enough.” It is also eye catching and alien to my American eyes.  And last Sunday’s performance was certainly the best I’ve seen them play this season.

Next up for Everton? Aston Villa on May 2. Aston Villa is teetering at 15th in the EPL and dangerously close to the relegation line. I know I’m going to keep an eye out to see if they can keep it up.

But the Latin team motto got me thinking, I wonder if an American football team should start to have their own motto. Nothing in Latin, because we wouldn’t want none of that highbrown learnin’ to get in the way of our smashmouth sports stuff.

Here are just a few.

For the NFL:

Chicago Bears – Once you go Ditka; you never really recover.

St. Louis Rams – We’re are we moving to next year?

Green Bay Packers – We’re men, in tight TIGHTS!

Washington Redskins – Honk if you Hate Dan Snyder.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Yes, I will take a confetti firing cannon along with my symbols of high sea rape and pillage.

Dallas Cowboys – How ’bout them underachieving icons of Texan bravado.

For the MLB:

San Diego Padres –  I love it when you call me Big Poppa, the Sho’ Stop-a.

New York Yankees – Don’t Hate the Player; Hate the Steroids.

Chicago Cubs – The best thing about our Club is the Ballpark we play in.

Florida Marlins – We’re Fish!

Los Angeles Dodgers – We’re originally from Brooklyn!


I’m curious if you think mottos could take root in all American Sports: NBA, NHL, MLS, MLB. Tweet me what you come up with. Make them snappy and funny; nothing vulgar.

Till next time, may the fourth be with you and follow me @Deepdfspicks.