It’s time for this weeks Dodgeballs With Cole!

The Redskins have removed thousands of seats from the upper deck of over 70,000 seat FedEx Field. According to reports, it is “part of an overall plan based on season ticket holder feedback.”
Judging from the sparse attendance of recent years I guess the Redskins took it to heart when the comment cards said the seat price wasn’t worth sitting through a game. Great now, if I go, I now have to stand through the terrible games at FedEx Field.

Things are awkward between Adrian Peterson and the Minnnesota Vikings right now and Twitter isn't helping.
Things are awkward between Adrian Peterson and the Minnesota Vikings right now and Twitter isn’t helping.

Adrian Peterson returns to Vikings practices after twitter-rant.
In possibly the most awkward moment of football in the springtime, Adrian Peterson returned to Minnesota Vikings practices this week after the Head Coach Mike Zimmer issued an ultimatum on Adrian Peterson’s future with the team. This comes after Peterson went on a twitter rant in reaction to Coach Mike Zimmer’s ultimatum.  Via Twitter, AP posed questions to his followers on whether a football contract was one-sided or two and this evolved into some strange blunted statements by AP. Gee, I wonder if they hugged it out before or after wind sprints.

North Dakota man convicted of driving a Zamboni drunk at a hockey game.
With nearly four times the legal limit, Steven Anderson was convicted of driving a Zamboni during the intermissions at a recent high school girls hockey game in Fargo. His defense attorney attempted to argue that a Zamboni wasn’t a vehicle under the state intoxication laws, but the Judge wasn’t buying the argument.
In case you were wondering, no Mr. Anderson wasn’t and is not likely to get a spot in the National Zamboni Racing Association’s upcoming season.

DC United might flee to Virginia in a fevered act of hermitization.
Representatives of Major League Soccer Club DC United have recently been seen lunching and flirting with Virginia Gov. Terry McAuliffe and representatives of Loudoun County over the possibility of DC United obtaining a new stadium just south of Nowheresville, Virginia. Needless to say, this news has only increased the animosity between the District and Northern Virginia and also comes in the 11th hour of dealmaking between the Club and DC Government and after the DC City Council approving a plan to give the Club space within the District for a new stadium near National’s Park.

Here’s a possible rendering of the potential new stadium for DC United in Loudoun County.
To put it all in perspective, if DC United were to move to Loudoun County they would be over 30 miles from the District border; that’s over 528 soccer fields from the District. I hardly call that “United.”

Till next time, never mix plaids with stripes.