Everyone knows Philadelphia is full of raging Phanatics that straight up HAMMER people. Opposing fans, media members, their own fans, their own team, anyone that’s on earth; they are a fearless Gang for sure. Although it appears their one weakness may have been discovered this past weekend. Flying Squirrel…I CHOOSE YOU
OH GOD HE’S TRYING TO KISS CHASE! IT SHOULD BE ME OUT THERE SOMEBODY STOP THIS GUY!!!
And guess what? Lil dude snuck into a crawlspace near the media camera well, which means this saga is FAR from over. #Squirrelgate will likely end up being the most exciting storyline of the entire Phillies season. At least until I jump from a foul ball net onto Chase with my Greenman outfit on in full glory. That’ll be so damn magical.